IT’S funny the people you meet in prison (or so I’m told, having never been behind bars, although some jobs are pretty much like serving a jail sentence).

In Coronation Street (ITV1) Peter Barlow is languishing in a cell awaiting trial for Tina’s murder and who should he meet but… I get ahead of myself. Peter, being a bit of a boozer (ie alcoholic), is intrigued when he hears about another prisoner known as The Landlord who sells alcoholic beverages to fellow inmates. Now, Peter likes a drop or two or three of the hard stuff and immediately seeks out The Landlord only to discover it’s Jim McDonald, ex-husband of Liz and father of Steve.

It’s Jim, so it is. And it’s Ken too, so it is.

He’s back and a trifle annoyed with wife Dreary Deirdre, who’s neglected to tell him everything about son Peter’s predicament.

Ken thinks his son has just got marital problems. When he learns that Peter is accused of murder he demands an explanation from DD.

As it was Rob whodunit, Ken goes all Cumberbatch, putting on his deerstalker and sucking on his pipe to play at being Sherlock Holmes and unmask Tina’s murderer.

Over in Walford and EastEnders (BBC1), people are looking at Kat and saying “what a pair”. They’re her newborn twins – what did you think I meant? – who arrive not entirely to plan. Kat has gone to hospital to visit sick Jean, but being an attention-seeker goes into labour at her bedside.

Before you can say “Push” she’s brandishing a pair of bouncing baby boys.

Mick Carter’s not having a good week.

First, he goes off the deep end when he competes in the charity swimming gala.

He’s been scared of water ever since Surely Shirley tried to drown him in the bath as a child.

After dipping his toe in the water, Mick finds himself held by the long arm of the law. He’s arrested for soliciting a prostitute, namely Cora’s daughter (Don’t) Rainie (On My Parade).

It’s a case of mistaken identity because it’s Ian, the sly dog, who’s been cavorting with an employee of the oldest profession.

Never trust anyone called Tracy in Soapland. Corrie’s Terrible Tracy is top bad girl, but Tracy in Emmerdale (ITV1) is one to watch.

She has poor gullible Sam, several bales short of a haystack, in her sights and using him for financial gain.

She’s persuaded Sam to get a new credit card – so she can spend, spend, spend. Robbie tries to warn Sam that his new lady friend is a wrong ‘un, but Sam won’t listen.

Jai and Leyla have given in to temptation, but managed to keep it a secret. Until now, when Jai’s arch-enemy and prospective brother-in-law Rakesh walks in on them impersonating a spread sheet on the office desk.

Rakesh tells Jai that unless he turns up at sister Priya’s engagement ceremony, he’ll tell everyone about him and Lilo Leyla.